When will I ever learn?

In the great classroom of life, I am often sitting in the corner wearing a dunce cap. This was a punishment in the old days when a student did not learn their lessons. Or maybe I would be standing at the blackboard writing "I will trust God no matter what" 100 times. In some things,I am definitely a slow learner with memory problems. No matter how many times God has proven Himself faithful in the past, I have trouble remembering--and trusting, and letting go.
God just let me have a remedial lesson in trusting--read on.

Whether you're sending your kids off to school as kindergartners--or college and post grad students(me), some things remain the same.
Three weeks ago, we sent our youngest son off to school--in Brazil, at the University of Santa Maria. This is an exchange between the Ag colleges there and at KSU. As we prepared him for 5 months overseas in a country where he does not know the language, I was struck with how it really was like sending him off to school when he was little.(Or high school, or college for the first time,etc.) Do you recognize the process?

1. Get the paperwork in order--health and immunization records,shots(for Josh a yellow fever shot),enrollment,list of supplies(VISA,Passport) Teach emergency phone numbers and contact names if they need help.(I put Josh's contact phone numbers for his professor and the boy,Diego,who was picking them up at the airport,with all his other information in a notebook)

2. Acquire the needed supplies--book bags, paper, pencils--clothes. If you haven't already,this is a great time to go through each child's closet and drawers-gifting outgrown items to someone else or a thrift store,making a list of what is needed. (Like underwear/socks that aren't gray and/or full of holes) When you can only take one 50 pound suit case, a book bag, and a small carry-on, you pare it down to the essentials--he wore his boots and packed his sneakers!

3. Rehearse problem scenarios and make Plan"B"s. In grade school, we talked about not lying or cheating, what to do if you're bullied, not to ride home with people other than your parents unless told, and which streets to take to walk home. We warned about "stranger danger", and staying out of "bad" neighborhoods. We talked about those things again with Josh--even printing out bus schedules of the town he would fly into, which was 5 hours away from the university. But what do you do when everyone is a stranger, even the person sent to pick you up at the airport, and very few even speak English? Instead of what to do if you miss the bus at school, we went over being bumped from your airplane flight (which happened!)

4. Pack book bag with needed items--besides school supplies, tissues,l ip balm, and snacks,and love notes!! A little extra money may be needed,too. Josh ate all snacks in the airport in Sao Paulo due to an unplanned 10 hour delay. I also snuck some Bible verses into his information notebook--love notes from home. When they were little, I sometimes wrote love notes or a "hi" message on napkins in their sack lunches on field trips.

5.Celebrate the first day of school! We made a special granola for breakfast, laid our clothes out the night before, packed supplies and took pictures. For each of the kids' graduation from high school, we displayed their first day of school picture and their last day of school picture. (Too cute--but about the undoing of their Mother!) We took pictures of the boys at the airport, and they sent pictures at their new school in Santa Maria.

6. Pray!!! Because no matter how prepared you think they are, no matter how many bases you try to cover--the unexpected happens--whether you're 5 or 21! About everything that we warned about happened to Josh and his friend Derek--they were bumped from their flight to Brazil,which messed up their arrival time in Port Alegre where they would be met. The emergency telephone numbers we had did not work--no one was in either college office to get our e-mails about flight changes. (All of my pride in organizing that information for Josh was for nothing--God once again proved He could manage without me!) Thankfully, Diego waited many hours for them--and then their truck broke down in the middle of the night in a bad part of town. People in the neighborhood came to the truck, (stranger danger!) the police came, and the boys spent the night in a questionable motel. Yet--at every step of the unknown and unplanned God was with them, protecting them and sending them the help they needed. (Which was what I really prayed for.) We didn't know where they were for about 48 hours--yet instead of frantically worrying as I usually would, I realized that God knew where the boys were and what they needed.

I opened my devotional that morning and it was called "At Home with God." What a truth to hang on to--wherever we are, wherever our children are, we are "at home with God".

Back to my corner and the dunce cap--last summer our daughter traveled to South Africa with a group on a mission trip. On her return trip, she was bumped from her flight with one other member of the team and re-routed through Paris instead of directly to Atlanta and then Wichita. We did not know this and went to Wichita to pick her up. The airline's computer was down and huge lines of people were waiting to fly to Atlanta. We met the next two flights from Atlanta--no Laurie. It was afternoon now, and only one more flight coming in. We began to be a little anxious about what had happened, then she called. I asked where she was--why wasn't she in Wichita? She then told me she was just getting back to the States and was in Atlanta hoping to get on the last flight back to Wichita. She had been awake over 24 hours traveling and was tired and alone. I was worried about her having to stay the night there. We were still talking when she said-"Oh,my gosh--the Holmes's are here." The Holmes's, Mitch and Michelle, are a couple who attend our little country church. I said,"Oh,honey--it must just look like them"--and she said,"No,mom--they're coming over!" It's true. They were in Atlanta for a State Representatives meeting and their flight had been delayed. What an awesome God to send people from home to my tired daughter in the Atlanta airport--she and I both relaxed. Laurie was able to get on the next flight but Mitch and Michelle had to stay the night and come home the next day.(Sorry, guys) This answer to prayer just blew our socks off!!

And this (plus many other examples) is why I need to remember to trust God, no matter what! "Oh ye of little faith, why dost thou doubt?"--Jesus reminds me, just as He did His disciples, to have faith in Him whatever the circumstances.

I am trying to let go--we can't follow our loved ones and make their paths smooth, but we can rest in knowing God is there with them.
Pray not only for your children (and do a dedication prayer for the new school year)
but pray for your schools,too. You may even want to start a Moms In Touch sort of group where you pray for your schools and communities.

For all you Moms sending chicks out of the nest, give'em a hug,a kiss,a smile and a prayer! No matter how old they are (or we are!)"first days" are hard.

Other lessons learned: Reduce Back-to-School stress
Set up a Staging Area-a place for book bags, instruments, shoes, jackets, etc. Something as simple as a board with hooks, an ottoman(with lid for storage), or chairs would work. Lay out clothes for the next day the night before. (This serves to alert you to no clean clothes,underwear,etc., plus saves time in the morning)

Have a routine--morning,after school and bed-time
List any morning chores or just what needs to be done-dress,wash up, brush teeth, get book bag.
After school--train your kids to empty book bags with you--look at homework, graded papers, and especially check for school letters or permission slips that need your attention. Sign and return permission slips, enter dates of activities on your desk calendar,etc. Do this while having after school snacks--you'll know what to schedule for your evening. (How many math problems, spelling words, reading pages or cupcakes you have to do!!)

Bedtime--here a routine will really save you arguments. Take baths, lay out clothes, find what's needed for tomorrow, read aloud, and have bedtime prayers.

Whew--this was a long one! May God bless your "lessons" this month--pay attention and learn them well the first time--don't be a slow learner like me!!

Are Your Branches Groaning?

If I had my friend Kim Fritzemeier's (Food for Thought blog) photographic abillities and techno-savy, you would see a picture of my peach tree with its limbs dragging the ground, loaded with peaches. Unfortunately,you'll have to imagine it--branches so laden with fruit that I had to prop them up with boards. Our Lovely Branches Ministries is celebrating a year of harvests, too, and we're praying that we can all abide in Jesus to bear more fruit.

How about you? How's your harvest? Being a gardner, I've got too much of a good thing right now. We just picked sand hill plums to make jelly and jam. I have corn, cucumbers, green beans and blackberries to do something with also. But in my spiritual life, or in my relationships with others, my harvests aren't so impressive. I'm not bearing much fruit because I'm not abiding with Jesus as I should.
One of my grandmother's favorite hymns has lyrics telling of meeting with Jesus in a garden alone in the morning, the chorus says: "And He walks with me, and He talks with me, and He tells me I am His own. And the joy we share as we linger there, none other has ever known."
Spend some time with the One who tells us that "apart from me, ye can do nothing."

Gardening season is also a great time to explain these Biblical principles to children. One of my favorites is the parable of the sower and also that you reap what you sow. (plant)
Clearly, if you plant watermelons, you don't get green beans. This is the tie-in to show children that what we "plant", our actions, thoughts and words, will be what we reap, or get back. If we plant kind words and deeds, that's what we get. If we plant selfish deeds, that will be our crop, too.
This is also how you can introduce the concept that what we "plant"or let into our minds is what we "reap" or have to think about. The book of Proverbs tells us that, "As a man thinketh in his heart, so is he." We become what we think about.

I am a strong believer in the GIGO concept, Garbage in, garbage out. If what we and our children see and hear is garbage, that is what we have to think about . My kids knew I was a real stickler on this--fortunately, they understood the concept and didn't really test us, even as teens with music or t.v. Movies, maybe. It's hard to go against the culture, but so much of what we hear and see is not encouraging or uplifting, let alone portraying values we should have as Christians. I can't tell you how often I would come into the family room and one son would change the channel--he knew he was watching something not worth his time.


If that is a form of censorship, then I was guilty. I tried to read good books to them, and we watched some movies and shows together. We would discuss whether choices were God honoring or dishonoring and the results. I would even read some of the books they were reading if I was unfamiliar with the author. Only once did I ask one to not read the rest of the book--I explained why, and he was o.k. with it.



Moms, you are the "gatekeeper" of your home. You (and your husband) decide what can come in and stay--be it magazines, books, music, movies, t.v. or computer/videogames. It's like an obnoxious or evil person passing by your house--you don't have to invite them in!
This means we have to be accountable in our own habits as well--we turned off programs we might have wanted to see because we knew they weren't the best. You have to hold yourselves as parents to the same standards! Your kids will be watching and listening to see what you watch and listen to.
When our kids were in grade school and started going to other homes, we had a special arrangement. If they were watching a movie that was scary or they didn't think was o.k., they could call me and say they had a headache or didn't feel good and I would come get them. Maybe that wasn't completely honest, but I didn't expect them to explain their discomfot at that age. (And it made for a quick solution--most moms are glad to send a little guest home if they don't feel good--which they didn't, if they were scared by a movie!) This only happened once.

Keep reminding your family and yourself that we can't bear much fruit unless we're abiding in Jesus and His word, and not filling our hearts, homes and minds with the garbage of the world.





Summer vacation is winding down, so aim for a harvest of good times and memories before the rush or school again.





May we all be "groaning" under the weight of a huge harvest of fruits for God.